Wednesday 22 June 2016

Insecure Me

Hey, internet!

So recently some of my friends (even myself) have been doubting themselves.

They're all really pretty and I would literally die to be them, I honestly don't know how they could even consider themselves being ugly or fat.

Today I wanted to talk to all of you about insecurities. I've come up with a list of five things that I'm insecure about and why I shouldn't be insecure about them.

1. Tucking my hair behind my ear -

A while ago during a history lesson my hair was really starting to piss me off, so I tucked my fringe behind my ear, not long after doing so my friend, let's call him Bert, said to me: "Ergh! You look horrible! You shouldn't do that, it makes you look even uglier!"

Yes. I said my friend. I haven't done it ever since, but I've started doing it again this week, and Bert hasn't commented on it once.

It's stupid to be insecure about something that small, even though I'm going through a tough time at the moment I seriously don't see why something so small can hurt me so much. I've started doing it in the mirror everyday, tucking my hair behind my ears, it looks beautiful, I look beautiful. (Ack! I've never said that before!)

2. My nose -

I honestly think my nose is HUGE! I used to be called Miss Piggy by some old friends of mine (We weren't friend at the time, obviously), that used to really get to me, then Miss Piggy stopped and turned into Peppa Pig.

Sometimes I still thinks it looks disgusting, especially in photos, it seems to look bigger on camera than it does in real life. But sometimes it looks cute, it suits my face shape and I don't think any other shaped nose would suit me to be honest.

If any of you hate or dislike one of your facial features then stop! Because someone else's nose, someone else's eyes, someone else's mouth, wouldn't look better than the one you have and you should feel good and confident about that. I've been reading a lot about face transplants, this one book in particular really touched me, 'Faceless', she always thought she was ugly before her accident, and only after she had had a face transplant did she realise that her old face, what she used to look like, was beautiful.

3. My weight -

I'm not obese. I'm not skinny. Okay, I could lose a bit, but I am losing weight, because of how insecure I felt about it.

In primary school or elementary school I was called a fat saggy elephant. In year 7 or grade 6, I was called fat multiple times and still am called that sometimes. I'm not that overweight, I look good in a swimsuit, I look good in a dress. I'm the healthy weight for my height and my age, yes I said I could lose a bit, that's because of how I look. I'm not 100% happy with it. But I'm not 100% unhappy with it.

No one deserves to be mocked because of their weight, there's always a story behind everything, maybe you should try to understand or hear their story before hurting someone because of it.

If you're the victim then all I can say is tell someone. Tell a friend. A teacher. A parent. A carer. Anyone. I know this sounds cliche but it's cliche for a reason. It's the best thing to do, honestly, it is, I've been there.

4. Complaining too much -

This is a new one, actually. Recently everything has just become too much and I want talk to someone about it, you know? So I did. I'm part of this spam account on instagram and I posted it on there, because writing about things helps me to feel better, I didn't ask for help, I literally just wrote about why I'm upset (I still do this).

One day my friend messaged me, let's call this person Ash. So, Ash messaged me saying something about me being hypocritical (idek what I was being hypocritical about but yannoe xD) and something about me complaining too much.

It made me feel even shittier and gave me the impression that I wasn't allowed to express my feeling or write posts like that even though the posts weren't aimed at anyone and I was really jut writing to myself.

I don't complain too much. And I still do posts like that because they just make me feel better after writing them.

5. Body acne -

So I'm not sure if this is normal or not but my upper limb on my arm is pimple-y (always has been) and my chest and back is too. My chest and back aren't too bad but it makes me feel really gross and disgusting.

Sometimes I'll get a couple of pimples on my forearm (literally one or two) the same with my legs. But I really hate it and I'm not sure if it's normal or not.

It's not serious body acne, it's like five to seven pimples on my back and chest and normal pimple-y arms that some people have (I happen to be one of them ;-;).

It's not bad. And it's not untreatable, so I guess I shouldn't feel insecure about it, I'll buy some remedies and things like that to get rid of it.

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The point of this being: You shouldn't feel insecure about anything. Yes, we all do, yes it's normal. But not little things like these. You'll always end up loving the things you hate now, it's true, I promise.

Have a nice day :)

~Virgo x

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